It is the year of change. Getting married, living in a new city, leaving my last name, seeking a new job, living with a guy! New new new. That’s what 2019 has in store for me. And truthfully it is soo exciting and also a bit daunting at times.
This is a remarkable season of life that Jonathan and I are in. One day we are ordering Save the Dates, the next we are touring venues, then there are food tastings and videographer interviews and scheduling pre-marital counseling. And, while in the midst of all of this, JT is flying all over the country on job interviews in places I have never been… Kansas, Oklahoma, Georgia, Arkansas, Pennsylvania and Texas. We won’t know where we will end up until March 29.
I have to admit I have never felt quite like this before… both excited and anxious, mixed with a little bit of nervousness all at the same time.
And, if you know me, you know that God has been working with me on patience for basically my whole entire life. I am the first born and I am always ready to go at life full speed ahead. What these past few months and even weeks have taught me is just to “Be still.” Enjoy this season of anticipation. Gosh, it is hard. Seeing JT get closer and closer to getting matched with a residency and having our first home solidified while I have zero control over that and then thinking of where I will soon have to apply for a job is hard. I’m like, “Please Jesus, I just want to know now where we will be soo badly so that I can start doing interviews too! I feel left out Jesus, let’s go!”
Also in this time, it has hit me that I am about to leave and cleave. (Genesis 2:24) Which means I will leave the comfort of my family and cleave/unite to and with only my husband. It’s uncharted waters for sure but it is a part of growing up and a part of growing spiritually. I know this is going to require so much faith and trust in God. But a cord of three is not easily broken. JT, with you, me and God, we’ve got this! And honestly, there is no one I would rather have by my side through life than Jonathan Thropay. He’s amazing in every way. And I know we are about to grow even stronger in our faith as we build our own home and that truly pumps me up! Let’s do this!
In church last Sunday the pastor spoke about the Lord as our comforter. This could not have come at a better time in the season that I am in. My heart was instantly calmed when that reminder was spoken. It was like God was draping a blanket over me and saying, “I’ve got you, Caitlin. You can trust me in these uncharted waters you are about to face.”
Through this time of being a fiancé, I may have some days where those nerves creep back into my mind when I start to think about the giant mountains in the distance, but I just have to remind myself that I am a child of God. I am in the hands of the #1 best comforter, provider, way maker, miracle worker, promise keeper and my one and ONLY Savior. All the details will work itself out and all will be well. So bring on the change!
130 days until we say, “I Do!”